Chest of memories

every box is a whole vision to the past, everything in it, its a memory, a good one a bad one, its just one memory that takes you to that place and time, so magical so beautiful so unbelievable, but real for a few minutes. It really makes me cry to open a new box and take out a new memory, i still have a lot to unpack, but it seems that the 11 boxes together are like this chest of memories that i dont really want to open, only sometimes when im lost or melancoholic i dont know how to describe the word but i have no choice cuz everything inside that chest i need it, its part of me, my past, my part of present, even if its not my future i still want to hold on to those memories even if they make me try to wonder why im here not where i want to be, next who the ones i love and i really miss and that special persons that make my day by only thinking of them. Its not going to be the same i already feel so lost and it has not even started the whole change, its only the beggining and im not ready for it, its turning over a new page of the book but i really dont want to change it, i want to stay in the same chapter, in the same page.

But i need to get used to it, this, i dont want to feel pain here, i dont want my family to see im sad, so i better pull myself together or at least pretend i have already. I cant let them see me breaking down so ill hide behind this smile even if theres this place so empty inside me ill keep hiding behind this smile, and i will wear sunglasses so nobody can see my teary eyes.

A dreamer dreams of an idea, and dreams it never dies*

MQ ......................... -? smm- simply me -M