Read me. P.D: you can comment here, its ok or email me, whatever you choose.

okay this is my second post over here, and i just entered school, something new, new nice people, new house, new ideas, new emotions, everything is just so new, and one of this things i wish i couldnt feel it but distance is really hard, i heard one of ryan cabrera's song from his latest album the moon underwater really touched me and like described the moment, let me write it down so you see why.

Eight years later
Time goes by fast
Got my memories
And they will last
I try to keep it simple 'cuz I hate goodbyes
I try to keep it simple by telling myself that
I, I will remember you
And all of the things that we've gone through
There is so much I can say
But words get in the way so
We're not together I will remember you
I will remember you

We're a picture in my mind
And when I wanna find you
I just close my eyes
You'll never be that far from me
So don't say goodbye 'cuz
You'll never be that far from me
I'm telling myself that

I, I will remember you
And all of the things that we've gone through
There is so much I can say
But words get in the way so
We're not together
I will remember you

You were there when I needed love and
Thank you, thank you
I never told you how much that meant
God thank you, thank you
I will remember you

And all of the things that we've gone through
There is so much I can say
But words get in the way so

I, I will remember you
And all of the things that we've gone through
There is so much I can say
But words get in the way so
We're not together I will remember
We're not together
I will remember you
I will remember you

About the first line of eight years later, it aint right and it wont be that long till i see you again so dont worry, ill show up, i just wanted you all to know that cuz i miss you all its not the same, its always rainy and its not like over there that i could enjoy rain with all of you, now i just see it fall down and wish i was over there, the city with the sea beside it. I hope you dont forget me cuz i wont, i wont let my mind and my heart to forget all those memories, they just mean too much to me, im struggling with emotions and distances so there is no much to do, now everything i do is different but average. One thing i ask you is to remember me as i am and as who is always there, dont you ever forget that. Thank you for everything, im still here but apart by roads.

A dreamer dreams of an idea and dreams it will never die*

MQ ......................... smm- simply me -Moni, nothing else.

Chest of memories

every box is a whole vision to the past, everything in it, its a memory, a good one a bad one, its just one memory that takes you to that place and time, so magical so beautiful so unbelievable, but real for a few minutes. It really makes me cry to open a new box and take out a new memory, i still have a lot to unpack, but it seems that the 11 boxes together are like this chest of memories that i dont really want to open, only sometimes when im lost or melancoholic i dont know how to describe the word but i have no choice cuz everything inside that chest i need it, its part of me, my past, my part of present, even if its not my future i still want to hold on to those memories even if they make me try to wonder why im here not where i want to be, next who the ones i love and i really miss and that special persons that make my day by only thinking of them. Its not going to be the same i already feel so lost and it has not even started the whole change, its only the beggining and im not ready for it, its turning over a new page of the book but i really dont want to change it, i want to stay in the same chapter, in the same page.

But i need to get used to it, this, i dont want to feel pain here, i dont want my family to see im sad, so i better pull myself together or at least pretend i have already. I cant let them see me breaking down so ill hide behind this smile even if theres this place so empty inside me ill keep hiding behind this smile, and i will wear sunglasses so nobody can see my teary eyes.

A dreamer dreams of an idea, and dreams it never dies*

MQ ......................... -? smm- simply me -M

Curve up ur lips and smile

uhm im tired and its barely 5:11 p.m, yesterday i slept at 5 a.m and they kicked my butt till i got up and it was like 11:30 or something and i was like ohh you mofos go and..... and then i paused and my eyes went blank cuz the dream i dreamt that night came up to my mind and everybody went "hey!!! moni what the heck happened?" and i was still dreaming awake, i was walking in my room and all I could see was you, staring at me and curving your lips to form a beautiful smile, jeez i felt like i melted, but then bam my brother hit me. ¬¬ aghh i wanted to kill him so bad, but he is my brother so i couldnt. Oh i almost forgot, i finished Breaking Dawn its all about for ever between Bella Edward and Renesmee i loved it, but at some point i didnt wanted to finish the book cuz i mean i just love the story too much, but well im finished with the saga...
im just awaiting for the movie, i hope its as perfect as the books.but well enough with the whole twilight saga all i say is that its CUTE hehe.

I like silence and in here i cant have it, everybody is always yelling, maybe that one of the reasons i stay up at 5, cuz another reason is that i have plenty of movies in my red laptop and last reason and most important because in those moments of silence and those dawn hours i wonder if you are asleep or awake or dreaming one of those options, cuz time is important, even if it makes us older, i dont worry about getting older, i just worry about the things i havent done and the words i havent said. I dont want to die without doing the things i would have liked doing at least once.

A dreamer dreams of an idea, and dreams it never dies*

MQ ......................... -? smm- simply me -M

inspiration...

Well my trip around canada and the amazing city of seattle is over, tonight im at monterrey, mexican land haha, i just heard those words from someone =) ha well i really dont know what to write here, i ran out of inspiration, a little weird i think, i was complaining because i havent had the time to write here eveyday but its like i cant think of anything. You come to my mind but when i blink you had already dissapeared from my mind, i need some rain, i need it..... , i also need to know you are ok but in my head i just get no answer and i hope you are and i also hope that you notice sometime, but well i cant do much im away from where im supposed to be, pictures burn my heart, its killing me to see your smile and closing my eyes and then opening them, cuz i know there is nowhere to find them cuz its only my imagination, hmm i need to keep breathing, i need to take a deep breath cuz even when it seems that im breathing, the air just doesnt get in my lungs, it feels like i have no lungs, like that hole i once talked about, the incompleteness the need for something or someone to fill me up, even if i didnt want to be helped but this time im only waiting for it to notice i need it and if that doesnt happen i guess ill have to travel to the corners of my mind to foind at least what keeps me away from falling apart one more time.
even thouhg i dont know how much can my heart handle the wait for that stuff to make me stand up, and i also dont know if it does fall apart how much time will it need to heal, can a song heal an awaiting body? i dont know that but at least im still writting once more and i will continue until every part of me is squeezed till i get the last drop of inspiration.

A dreamer dreams of an idea, and dreams it never dies*

MQ ......................... -? smm- simply me -M

look at the panorama

Ok guess what? i lost my notes of the other five days, im such a moron jeez but well im in canada and i dont have the time to write here, and that kind of bothers me cuz everyday its a new post sometimes small and sometimes long. The thing is the other 4 days of countdown are resumed like this i have the power to keep writting my life book all of those who i leave behind are still on my book and they will always be, they are in a special chapter of my book so i wont let time rip that chapter page by page, its locked and im the one that can chooses to rip the pages or not, and i wont destroy it.
Well changing subjects im in canada well was now im in seattle washington beautiful city i would really like to live here but canada is also so gorgeous everywhere you look there is nature around you, but when i look around i think of you, if you could watch every landscape, they look like paintings, so perfect, i know you would like canada so fresh and full with nature, even if its cold as hell.... ehmm i dont think thats a good way to describe the cold but whatever.

its like 2:46 over here in seattle and in mexico should be like 4 something and im not sleepy, what a surprise. Canada is one of those places for people who love nature and athletes a lot of hiking, skiing, snowboarding, but now it aint season for snow but when it is a lot of people go have the taste of adrenalin and cold ha, i wished a little snow, but at least i have rain that reminds me of you, so as the green trees i pass by driving, and its not because i have nothing to do cuz ive got plenty of distractions but you make my time fly and i feel good when i think of you and i ask myself if you are fine or if you are not, i would really like to know and i also would like to have more time to write over here about... . you and everything that involves you but i have to look at this beautiful panorama and keep my head up high and imagine everything is falling in the right place.

A dreamer dreams of an idea, and dreams it never dies*

MQ ......................... -? smm- simply me -M